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Healing the Self when Forgiveness seems too Generous: A Radical Approach

Healing the Self when Forgiveness seems too Generous: A Radical Approach

By Janis Abrahms Spring, PhD, ABPP

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1.5 CE's

 

Forgiveness is good for us and good people forgive – right? But are some interpersonal traumas – infidelity, abuse, neglect – simply unforgivable? This new way of thinking about forgiveness may be described as radical. In this Featured Course Dr. Abrahms Spring gives us an alternative to forgiveness called Acceptance, which spells out ten steps hurt parties can take to rise above a violation; such as refusing to live in a grudge state, de-shaming the injury, taking a fair share of responsibility for what went wrong, and giving up a need for revenge but not a need for justice. It will also help them forge a relationship with the offender that makes sense and serves their best interest. This could mean cutting off from that person or full engagement. In the end, hurt parties will learn to heal themselves – with or without forgiving an unrepentant offender. This is an intermediate course intended for practicing clinicians.

Learning Objectives

  1. Critique popular assumptions about what it means to forgive.
  2. Create a recovery plan which allows healing without forgiving an unapologetic offender.
  3. Describe techniques to help hurt parties overcome their obsessive preoccupation with the injury.
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